Talking - Writing

Today I spent half of it out in the world. Which is not as common for me anymore. Even though I leave the house most every day I have specific places that I go to. Regularly attended meetings, quilting, ladies aid, writer's group, art meetings - get the idea? So being out "among them" is not such a norm today. The day to day conversation of people is very revealing - in person and on the internet.

With the benefit of daily lit I am reading a lot of literature in small doses via my email. The first thing that I notice is that in the past many authors vocabulary were very broad. They thought things through. And even though they related personal experiences it was done in a way that anyone could relate to, and some if it has at least lasted for one century. It was easy to see that people saw that we are only part and parcel of the whole. They not only saw it, they related it so that we could see it too. People voiced their thoughts and their feelings. No, I take that back, something more than their feelings - authentic emotions. Not as trivial as feelings.

Instead of the reality of the universe, today I was met with more detailed answers from clerks when I said, "How are you?" than I could imagine. I heard from people in lines at the cashier line more intimate details than I was comfortable with. How come complaining, even though we think it is universal, never hits the same chord inside us that does true joy, grief or rapture? Sure, we can voice any or all of our thoughts, but if we knew that Thomas Jefferson or Walt Whitman was in the store, would we want to? Having the right and the discretion are two different things, ok, they used to be.

Speaking of speaking........ I had the experience of getting my information confused and having to return to the drugstore for a pharmacy purchase three times. It was sad to me that the clerk seemed to be scared of my reaction. (No, I had not met her before.) As I thought of expressing my frustration a few things dawned on me. I hope these can be universal and strike a chord.

First of all - they do not give a discount if I am difficult, so it does not pay - literally. Second, people do not get paid to be stupid or nasty, so there is no sense in inferring it. Third, I do not help alot trying to a "Bitch for Jesus". Remember what we used to teach children? Walk through the world as a compassionate prince or princess. See how it works tomorrow.

For now I just decided I should go home, before my "inner bitch" revealed herself. After all, I wear pearls now. It changes a woman.

Arboretum

Today we went again to the local arboretum. It is the second time this week that we have been able to go. It is such an amazing place. As soon as we drive onto the property I can feel myself let go of any weekly residuals.

My beloved and our puppy walk most of the length of the entire park and they park me and the car at a different place every time. Sometimes I am at the Japanese garden, sometimes the lake etc. Usually I spend the time doing my Tai Chi and looking at the scenery. Then I am able to play my flute or do some needlecraft. Today I chose to finish crocheting a toboggan for the Tibetan Nuns.

To be crocheting their hats in such a peaceful place is a dichatomy that is almost unbearable. Free Tibet.

Writer's Conference

Today we drove about 30 minutes out of town with friends to attend a writer's Conference. It was wonderful! The keynote speaker was authentic and friendly and talked about finding or unearthing our voice in writing. I also took two workshops on Poetry. One was on informal poetry and the other was on formal. They both were very well done. The woman who did informal poetry had wonderful excercies to bring out our words. The workshop on formal poetry was excellent. For the first time I feel like I have somewhat of a grasp on meter and rhyme. The man was well organized, articulate and you could tell he loved his topic.


The important part was that we were with other writers and there is an understanding there that is needed in lone work. It is nice to talk about the process and see how others integrate writing in their life. I have been looking forward to this day all year. My beloved and I got to go together. Interest in writing is something we have in common. And sharing this with our friends made a very pleasant day.

Mental Health System

I have spent the last few days I have spent time with a friend who has a life time in the mental health system, and once again has need to avail herself to their services. She is manic to the hilt. To the point where her physical health is compromised. Since her case manager had meetings this morning and we have had a history of a little over 20 years I said I would take her to the local mental health station so she could be re-evaluated and entered in the hospital.

Three hours later we had spent most of the time in a small office with each other. There were no patients in the waiting room and the staff was laughing and going from office to office. She is 64 years old and they actually wanted her to re-explain a suicide attempt at the age of 16 - she has been a client at this place for at least 22 years. They know her!

They asked her the date - she suggested they get calendars instead of always depending on her. They asked her who the President was, she answered correctly and suggested they watch TV. After this we waited again. Then we were told if we hung in there another 3 hours, we could could admitted. I said no!

I left her there when I realized that as long as I was there, they did not have to deal with her. She did not get attention if I as there. Once again the mentally ill are treated as the lepars of our society. This week she went to the ER and was dismissed because they had trouble dealing with her - this resulted in a slight heart atack and edema.

I wish I knew the answer - money does not seem to be it.

Tonite I went to a meeting for ZaaP - a local artist's group. It was the most well oiled meeting I have ever been to. It started at 5:30 and ended in 45 minutes. In that time we plugged everyone that had one's individual shows, decided on themes for the rest of the year, and decided sitting schedules for the next month. It was so nice that to see that the important topic was the art and not the buracracy.

Today was spend doing wonderful fulfilling things. We spent a leisurely morning at home with each other and then I went quilting. Afterwards I picked up my beloved and we went to lunch were we could eat out on the patio. Then we picked up the puppy and went to the local Arboretum for down time for me and excercise for them.

Home to study and eat supper, wait for basset blogging and got to bed to start all over again.

With the celebration of Earth Day I too have a few easy suggestions to make all of our lives a little more green. As with most things in life, it is the simplest ideas that can make our lives more pleasant and worthwhile. The big changes that we think of we often can not follow through with, as they start out too overwhelming and end soon.

One way to make life green in almost every way possible is to use vinegar as your main cleaning agent. Vinegar is a natural aneseptic, has a clean aroma and is gentle to all forms of the environment, including pets and humans. Vinegar in the laundry makes a big difference in the colorfast-ness of your clothes and does not pollute our water ways. I have used vinegar almost exclusively as a cleaner in my home. I have used it in the laundry, the floors and windows, the dishes, myself, my hair and the kittens. It is best used diluted with water. I also drink it each day, and it is said to be helpful with a number of ailments, and can be used in weight loss and mineral intake.

Growing sprouts is a good green adventure for the whole family. Any little space will do with the simplicity of a mason jar and cheesecloth. Sprouts add oxygen to your kitchen and green to your diet. If you have a little bit more room, a kitchen herb garden is also nice to have. Fresh herbs, eye candy and more oxygen, everyone wins.

Even apartment dwellers can garden in small containers. Tomatoes, peppers, leaf lettuce, basil, oregano, hot peppers are all easy crops. Or just a simple herb garden with edible flowers adds beauty to our surroundings. This simple act can also slow us down as we commit to the care of our green friends that nourish us.

Having the beauty of nature in front of us, helps remind us daily to be good guardians. Having a small acquariam and a terrarium gives us the benefits of the combined beauty of water, plants, earth, air, living beings and the fire of the sun. Recently during a recoup after surgery I found the benefits of green in a terrarium during the winter months. The other past time that benefitted me and nature was the act of feeding the birds. This not only helps the birds, but is a constant array of beauty and entertainment.

Finally if at all possible get out of doors every day. Walk, excercise, sit, and BREATHE. The more we are a part of nature, the more we will fight for it.

Libber

I have been reading lately how it seems that when people become liberated that means they take on traditionally male roles. I agree, that is mostly what I have seen and what I have done in the past. Lately though I am looking at liberation in a new light.

I am the most liberated at this time in my life than I have ever been. I am seeking to do things that matter to me and thata form my life. I am in love with a man I am to marry in June and am living with him presently. I have a houseful of furry children who win most of my daily attention. I am pursuing an education for the sole purpose of being educated and finishing an adult long endeavor. I am becoming more involved in the arts in my home town and am learning to put my work forward.

Today I had a young couple come and turn over the garden and two ladies came to clean, while I cooked for the large alergic furry (St. Bernard), did laundry and dishes. I read my literature blogs, my religious readings and did some political blogging. I will do homework soon and then work to have dinner in farious forms of ready. I hope to add writing, music and some needleart to my schedule. I have dropped some more "out of home" charity work and now leave only two days a week, for maybe three hours each. Other times I leave the house are errands, Dr appointments and evening meetings with my beloved. My day is full and I have never been so free.

My great grandmother was "blessed" with a traveling sort of man who picked female traveling guides and companions. She had given up her citizenship in order to marry him, because he was not yet a citizen. He left and eventually brought home wives and girlfriends as he came to visit his sons. She always welcomed these women with open arms and a meal at the head of the table, as long as she could stay on the farm and no one would take her boys. That is a true "libber". And all of this is liberation - true freedom.

Last day of Break

Today is the last day before school starts again. I couldn't help myself - I already posted my bio in one class. Then I read the criterea - I am overwhelmed already. But I am learning that that is what school is. It not only teaches classes, but coping with scheduling and management.

I am asking that anyone who reads this please send light to the following:
Cassie - a toddler with cancer
Haley - with ED
Hunter - reoccurring blood issures

Thank you

Up Again

I believe that my last post was exactly a month ago. My beloved is posting every day now. I have been working at essays and trying to prioritize. So many things such little time.

In our town we have these very large vases that are painted by artists in the area and then placed around town. I was asked to paint one. I am amazed. Today I received my vase and manyof us got together to paint. I am doing one relating to needleart and tole painting combined.

I have quit some of my out of home charity work. I am trying to do more charity work that goes with my interest in needleart. So many women tell me they can not contribute because they are home. There is so much to do -cancer patients, refugees, homeless, newborns and their mothers, war effort. Needleartists Unite!

I am going to start writing in my blog everyday too. Just do it.